What's that? Gyros. Looks like a kebab to me. Yes, it is, they call them gyros here. Have you ever wondered what's in it? Well, it's meat and salad in a pitta, isn't it? Is it? Isn't it?

Gyros takeaways are everywhere in Budapest. They serve at any time. They're cheap. So what's the catch?

You're going to die! (No kidding.)

My name's Andrew and I used to be addicted to gyros. I gave it up about 6 months ago and I've never looked back. [Applause.] I called them gyrosh, for a while, thinking that Hungarians did that. They don't. I never thought they were healthy. It's just, at 4 o'clock in the morning, when the alcohol abuse stops, the stomach remembers its primary purpose, and there aren't that many alternatives.

I gave up gyros because I came to notice that, more often than not, I didn't like it very much. For a while, I thought I was just getting a dud here and there, and it's certainly true that quality varies. But I eventually realised that when I was kind-of sober, and the meat was chicken, it was just too greasy; and if the meat was, well, whatever the brown one is, it was just too... not that much like meat.

Which raises the question: what is the brown one exactly; the 'meat' gyros? I mean, it goes without saying that anything called 'meat' without specifying which meat, could be anything. But perhaps it's not that they don't want to tell you but rather that they can't!

Not surprisingly, I'm not the first to consider this; click here for more extensive research.


The final straw was that Andy T kept going on about this article in The Guardian. Just in case you can't be bothered to follow the link, the key phrase for me was:

"Eating two a week could cause a heart attack within 10 years."


Yikes!

Now, that's a worst case scenario, clearly, and one relating to someone who eats "pie and chips and fried breakfasts as well." Now I'm not that big on pies but I do occasionally have a fried breakfast. How many years does that give me, I wonder?


Sorry gyros, we can't be friends anymore.
Tessék?

Igen, I think you heard me right. I said, "Szeretnék egy falafelt!"

Andy Sz.

2 comments:

  1. Anonymous said...

    You make me giggle and giggle until i think i'm going to burst! So glad i'm veggie (with a fetish for Chorizo only, well everyone needs meat one way or another).  

  2. SF said...

    Without gyros, I predict a mass exodus of expats from Budapest due to the lack of available and easily obtainable food in town. However, less expats to deal with could also be good for a person's health.  


 

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